The Peelers Post

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Back in the 70's BJ was a very popular girl's name. Ironically this is the name I chose for my only daughter. She sends me messages from Canada frequently and I've included this section for her to share her thoughts.

 
Her personal motto is:
 
"Work like you don't need money, Love like you've never been hurt, and Dance like no one's watching"
 
 
Never Argue with a Woman

One morning the husband returns after several hours of fishing and
decides to take a nap. Although not familiar with the lake, the wife decides to take the boat out. She motors out a short distance, anchors, and reads her book.
Along comes a Game Warden in his boat. He pulls up alongside the woman and says, "Good morning, Ma'am. What are you doing?"
"Reading a book," she replies, (thinking, "Isn't that obvious?")
"You're in a Restricted Fishing Area," he informs her.
"I'm sorry, officer, but I'm not fishing. I'm reading."
"Yes, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment. I'll have to take you in and write you up."
"If you do that, I'll have to charge you with sexual assault," says the woman.
"But I haven't even touched you," says the game warden.
"That's true, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment."
 "Have a nice day ma'am," and he left.
MORAL: Never argue with a woman who reads. It's likely she can also
think.
Send this to four women/girls who are thinkers. If you receive this, you know you're intelligent.
      
 
Once upon a time there was a female brain cell which, by mistake,
happened to end up in a man's head. She looked around nervously
because it was all empty and quiet.
"Hello?" she cried, but no answer. "Is there anyone here?" she
cried a little louder, but still no answer. Now the female brain
cell started to feel alone and scared and yelled at the top of her
voice,
"HELLO, IS THERE ANYONE HERE?"
Then she heard a faint voice from far, far away.............

"We're down here ..."

 
Choosing a wife
 
 A man wanted to get married.
He was having trouble choosing among three likely candidates. 
He gives each woman a present of $5,000 and watches to see what they do with the money.
The first does a total make over. She goes to a fancy beauty salon gets her hair done, new make up and buys several new outfits and dresses up very nicely for the man. 
She tells him that she has done this to be more attractive for him because she loves him so much.
The man was impressed.
The second goes shopping to buy the man gifts.
She gets him a new set of golf clubs, some new gizmos for his computer, and some expensive clothes.
As she presents these gifts, she tells him that she has spent all the
money on him because she loves him so much.
Again, the man is impressed.
The third invests the money in the stock market. 
She earns several times the $5,000.
She gives him back his $5000 and reinvests the remainder in a joint account.     
She tells him that she wants to save for their future because she loves him so much.
Obviously, the man was impressed.
The man thought for a long time about what each woman had done with the money he'd given her.
Then, he married the one with the biggest boobs.
Men are like that, you know.
There is more money being spent on breast implants and Viagra today than on Alzheimer's research. This means that by 2040, there should be a large elderly population with perky boobs and huge erections and absolutely no recollection of what to do with them.

New Canadian Immigration Laws

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